Saturday, September 22, 2012

Dogs and butterflies: a childhood memory



I don’t remember all that much from my early childhood, but I have one formative
memory that sticks with me to this day. I think I first realized I was meant for a life with
dogs when I met Wally. Wally was a Siberian husky with heterochromia or two different
colored eyes. He was a wild dog, always looking for an escape or meal in the form of
another animal. Wally was adopted by my uncle when I was very little. My uncle lived
in the same apartment building as my grandma who babysat me. Wally was the cutest
puppy I had ever seen. He had strong brown and white markings. I instantly bonded
with Wally. We became the best of friends. I thought we would end up growing up
together, but alas this was not to be. Wally drank anti-freeze and died at the tender age
of two. The dangers of antifreeze is a another story for another day. Wally left this world
on, of all days, my uncle’s birthday. He was not handling it well and neither was I. To
this day, we always talk about Wally when it gets to be that time in May.

My uncle brought Wally back from the vet in a blanket. I cried for days following the
news of his death. It was my first experience with death that actually affected me
in a profound way. After all, I didn’t even cry at my grandfather’s funeral, instead I
played with Hot Wheels on the pews. I never felt heartbreak until the day I lost Wally. I
considered myself a loner, and Wally was the perfect parallel to my personality in dog
form. He was at times my best friend.

I had to be there the day he was laid to rest. Wally’s lifeless body was buried in my
uncle’s backyard. He was the first of many pets to be placed under the flower beds. I
remember the Beatles’ song, “Let It Be” played on the radio as we paid our respects. It
was so unbearably painful, but as young as I was, I recognized he was in a better place.
As the song continued, “when the night is cloudy there is still a light that shines on
me...” we saw the most beautiful monarch butterfly dance around the yard. He did
circles around my uncle and then around me, eventually landing on Wally’s grave. I
remember saying, “There’s Wally. He’s saying goodbye to us.” It was extremely rare to
see a monarch in the midwest this early in the season. I knew it had to be him. Every
year around the anniversary of his death we would see a butterfly in the yard. They
would always just fly right up to me. Without hesitation I would consider this Wally
checking up on me. I no longer believe in reincarnation, but for a time in my life, this
coincidence helped me to cope with losing Wally. From that day on, I loved butterflies
and recognized the fragility of life. Butterflies have all sorts of symbolic representations.
Some say their transformative nature means resurrection. Christians associate them
with the soul. Whatever the case, I no longer believe in superstition. It made me
recognize how much I truly and deeply I love animals. I was destined for a life with

dogs. To this day I always cry when an animal dies in movies. To this day I collect
things with butterflies. “Let It Be” remains one of my all-time favorite songs and I have
spent the better part of my life being touched by amazing animals. I see a little bit of
Wally in all of them.



by Mary C.